Michel Cayouette

L’hymne à l’Amour de Paul (1 Corinthiens 13)

^12:31 Paul : « Je vais vous montrer la voie qui surpasse tout.

^13:1Quand je parlerais les langues des humains et des anges, si je n’ai pas l’amour, je suis une pièce de bronze qui résonne ou une cymbale qui retentit.

²Quand j’aurais la capacité de parler en prophète, la science de tous les mystères et toute la connaissance, quand j’aurais même toute la foi qui transporte des montagnes, si je n’ai pas l’amour, je ne suis rien.

³Quand je distribuerais tous mes biens, quand même je livrerais mon corps pour en tirer fierté, si je n’ai pas l’amour, cela ne me sert à rien.

⁴L’amour est patient, l’amour est bon, il n’a pas de passion jalouse ; l’amour ne se vante pas, il ne se gonfle pas d’orgueil, ⁵il ne fait rien d’inconvenant, il ne cherche pas son propre intérêt, il ne s’irrite pas, il ne tient pas compte du mal ; ⁶il ne se réjouit pas de l’injustice, mais il se réjouit avec la vérité ; ⁷il pardonne tout, il croit tout, il espère tout, il endure tout.

⁸L’amour ne meurt jamais.

Les messages de prophètes ? ils seront abolis ; les langues ? elles cesseront; la connaissance ? elle sera abolie.

⁹Car c’est partiellement que nous connaissons, c’est partiellement que nous parlons en prophètes ; ¹⁰mais quand viendra l’accomplissement, ce qui est partiel sera aboli. ¹¹Lorsque j’étais tout petit, je parlais comme un tout-petit, je pensais comme un tout-petit, je raisonnais comme un tout-petit ; lorsque je suis devenu un homme, j’ai aboli ce qui était propre au tout-petit.

¹²Aujourd’hui nous voyons au moyen d’un miroir, d’une manière confuse, mais alors ce sera face à face. Aujourd’hui je connais partiellement, mais alors je connaîtrai comme je suis connu.

¹³Or maintenant trois choses demeurent : la foi, l’espérance, l’amour ; mais c’est l’amour qui est le plus grand.

^14:1Recherchez l’amour.*

Speakers Scripts

Amy Beetham

As I thought about what I wanted to say today, it was very hard for me to think beyond my loss to something more positive - the memories of my sister. Those same memories though, have been pulling me through these difficult days.

Along with my own memories, I have enjoyed the stories of my sister and her impact on those around her that I have heard from others. They show me a version of my sister that is sometimes new to me, or that reminds me of happier days. It has been comforting to see all these facets of Kelly.  I will now share a few of my thoughts.

For me, Kelly was my big sister, always there, looking out for and supporting me.  With our 4 year age difference, I was always seeking her attention in our early years.  Given my persistence in seeking attention from my sisters, it is clear to me that Kelly had great patience even when she was young. She was also a voracious reader, and helped instill a love of books and reading in me.

As so many have relayed to me Kelly was a gentle and kind soul.  I agree. That did not mean she was a pushover though. I  always knew that my sister had my back, and in one memorable childhood incident Kelly took up the charge of sticking up for her younger sisters and clearing our yard of the neighbourhood bullies.  There was some teamwork involved, but Kelly was our clear leader.

Kelly was a night owl and not a morning person. I am a morning person and delighted in being the one to poke her awake as she would wake up swinging.  Kind and gentle yes, strong right hook yes. All I can say is duck! 

I recently read through my written account of the 5-day, 86 kilometer expedition to Mont Tremblant we undertook to complete the Duke of Edinburgh's Gold  Award program. Kelly back-packed more than 40 kilometers with a broken toe over challenging terrain - definitely not a pushover!

Over her lifetime, I watched her excel in so many endeavours - school always seemed easy to her - not truly the case, she was a hard worker. A life-long learner, she particularly loved  languages and music.  She used to torture me by practicing flute and piccolo, the end result was fantastic and she got there with relentless practice. She was a perfectionist and overachiever in the best sense of those words.  Her interests were varied and she was one of the most creative people I know. Her knitted socks were works of art.

In our early twenties, we had the opportunity to share an apartment for a year. We got to know each other better as adults, and I also got to see her and Dan growing together in love.  Their wedding day was one of my favourite days - she was so happy.  And those sneakers, with the pretty ribbons were well worth the time it took to thread them.  She knew she wanted comfortable footwear to dance the night away!

Kelly was a very caring person and demonstrated this in many ways and more recently as Aunt Kelly to my daughters Sophia and Leah. I recall her being surprised by both her young nieces as they immediately gravitated to her.  Sophia was a collicky baby who did not like to be held, but calmed down as soon as Kelly picked her up. As I told her - they instinctively knew that she was their people and they loved her unconditionally. I see a lot of Kelly in my girls, and am grateful for it.  Kelly had a playful nature and also had a lifelong love of toys and children-friendly tv shows and movies. I remember Kelly and I were thrilled when she got to research and catalogue the items from the children's tv show Hammy Hamster and Tales Along the Riverbank, when she was working at the Children's Museum.  I can just picture her holding the miniature diving bell - that must have been so much fun. She enjoyed sharing her interests with her nieces, and in what seems like a full circle, she now showed her patience, kindness and love with them - giving her full attention in-person and over Skype.

As I reflect on all that Kelly was to me and our family, I will simply distill it down to the undeniable fact that she was both very lovable and deeply loved by all of us.

Khrysta Gresswell

We belong.  In our lives we belong to many groups. Our families, our schools, our jobs, our friends.  Some of the people in the groups we don’t get to choose.  It was like that for Kelly, Laurie and myself.  There was no choice...and we lucked out big time!! 3 20 something year olds forced to work and travel together could have turned into some made for tv drama miniseries - instead we discovered 3 connected kindred spirits with lots of wonderful differences but more in common then we cared to admit!  For a couple of years we survived Upper Canada Village -”behind the scenes”. The brutal cold, the extreme heat, mean momma racoons, baby groundhogs, dive bombing wasps flooding and even a ghost or 2...and with the introduction of Jeanette to our little group- the 3 amigos became the BBB’s :) movie nights out. Girls nights in. pot luck cocktails (oh boy!)…we survived it, lived it, laughed with it and loved it.  Break ups, marriages, tragedies, heart breaks, and children.  Life had a way of making our get-togethers end up farther apart, but we would always come back together and we would hug and laugh and pick up right where we left off.  I have so many amazing memories of Kelly, but by far - her cheeky smile and amazing laugh will be what i will always see when i think of her!!  Her joy of life was infectious (i know not a good word in this day and age) but it was. She was the Joe-Cool(thats my snoopy reference) of the group that always made everyone feel at ease.  My Group…..As we go through life our groups will change as we leave school, get a new job, find a new relationship but friends -no matter how far or how close- no matter if you talk 5 times a day or 2 times a year- close friends are a group of people that will be connected through their kindred spirits no matter where you are on the space time continuum(and thats my star trek reference).

Daniel, Marvia and Amy my heart is with you and Kelly. I Love You.

Kaitlynne-Rae Landry

Kelly and I had a pact. She was to give me at least 6 months heads up before retiring so that I would have ample time to apply to other jobs. I always reminded her of this pact with a laugh: it was a joking, not joking sort of thing. But we both knew I wasn’t really joking. Why? Because I couldn’t imagine doing the job we shared without her.

Kelly and I worked together for over four years, a decent chunk of which we spent sharing an office, sharing laughs, and sharing gripes. We worked mostly with a system that she had seen through from it’s infancy to now – let’s just say it’s age is showing a bit. It is a huge database that has enough quirks, demands, and sometimes even tantrums to fill a novel. Kelly always knew just how to make it do her bidding. And how to ensure that her painstakingly well structured reports ran smoothly to present the best possible data. Her attention to detail and care, also shown in her gorgeous knitted pieces, is what made her an irreplaceable member of the team as well as a simply fantastic human being. 

Most of my fondest memories with Kelly involve knitting in some way of another – despite me not being able to knit to save my life – too much tension in my hands or something. One such memory, from back when I had just started at PCO was being at the back of some giant (and honestly, boring) meeting. I soon learned what a project bag was because Kelly quietly brought hers out and resumed working on a project – right there in the meeting. I’m pretty sure you could tell Kelly’s overall impression of the meeting we were in by how much or little effort she put into disguising or hiding the fact she was knitting. But that’s just a little theory of mine.

Kelly brought passion into everything she did. She would lament how finicky some knitting projects were – especially that multitude of little tiny hearts made out of sock yarn – but she still knit 30 of them for her newsletter photo. We’d complain generously about how frustrating our database was/is but she still poured so much time and care into making her the reports and responses she provided for folks were detailed and comprehensive. Kelly took particular delight in being able to complain about those guys over at Shared Services once Daniel started working there. Jokingly blaming it on him was a surefire way for her to laugh.

I’m sure I drove her bonkers sometimes – I’m very much a “how can I get a script to do at least some of this for me” person. She took the time, again and again to show me why those details, like each stitch matters. And when I rushed and overlooked things and missed a stitch, she was always there to help me undo and correct whatever I had stumbled on.

Her smiles, gripes, and comradery will be so, so, incredibly missed by myself and the rest of our closely knit (pun intended) team.

Tamara Ford

I was deeply saddened to hear of Kelly’s passing. 

Kelly and I worked together for many, many years in the Senior Personnel Secretariat (SPS) in the Privy Council Office. I first met Kelly when she was completing her Computer Science program at Algonquin College. She joined SPS as the Systems Operations Officer when she finished her program, a position she held until her passing. Kelly and her unique personality were a perfect fit for the SPS environment, and she became a valuable, respected and beloved member of the SPS team. 

Kelly’s strong work ethic, her get it done attitude and her collegiality were important attributes in her role as Systems Operations Officer, which saw her producing reports and statistics for use not only by SPS but also by the Prime Minister’s Office, offices of Cabinet Ministers, and departments and organizations across the spectrum of government. Kelly was the consummate team player. Kelly was also a master at juggling multiple demands and priorities. And, while she may have been experiencing inner turmoil, her colleagues would never have known. She greeted all with her trademark smile on her face and a promise to do the best she could. And, boy did she! She was the essence of grace under fire. 

Kelly was a dedicated and talented public servant and the kind of colleague with whom it is a pleasure to work. A kind, gracious and humble colleague, Kelly had a delightful and sometimes mischievous sense of humour and a knack for putting those around her at ease, even during the most hectic of times. 

I feel blessed to have known Kelly and privileged to have worked and interacted with her for so many years. She was truly a remarkable human being who will be sorely missed. 

Daniel, Mrs. Beetham, Amy, Sophie, Leah, Larry and the Cayouette family, please accept my most sincere sympathies on your loss. To quote Helen Keller: What we have once enjoyed we can never lose. All that we love deeply becomes a part of us. May Kelly’s memory, and the memories you made with her, be blessings as you seek peace and courage in the days and weeks ahead. 

Liane Thiry-Smith

Daniel Cayoutte

Bonjour, j’aimerais remercier tous les participants de cette cérémonie pour la mémoire de Kelly.  C’est bien apprécié. Merci encore. 

I want to extend my thanks to the Knox United Church for hosting and organizing this with a special thank you to Patty, Wendy and Karen for putting this together. Thanks to each of the speakers today that have brought forward special moments of Kelly’s life. She was quite remarkable. 

For the few times that we would talk about dying, Kelly would insist that she wanted fireworks at her funeral. Fireworks would bring such joy to her. She would be so excited. So, we will have fireworks at the end. I hope that once we can meet physically, we will be able to have real fireworks in her honour. 

We first met 31 years ago, yesterday, in 1990.  I met Kelly playing badminton at the University of Ottawa gym.  We were both students at the time. On our way to the local pub after the game, Kelly pointed out to a bunny in the clouds.  I looked up and at first I only saw a fluffy cloud, then the Bunny formed.  It was like a new world was opening to me. She showed me how to look up and around and be amazed at the beauty of the universe. She would do this over and over again. She had such a great sense of observation. Look around, smell the flowers she would say. Love the sunsets and notice the rainbows. I would call her Bunny thereafter. 

She had a brilliant mind and a spirit of independence. On one of our many car trips to her parents, our muffler started dragging. It was dark and raining. We were in the middle of nowhere without cell coverage. Kelly took charge, she got to the ground under the car and tied the dragging muffler back with her trusty bungy cord. She was always prepared. I only watched and tried to help by holding an umbrella as she worked.   She was so proud of that moment, and we would talk about this  for  many years to come. 

Kelly had been driven to service from a young age through wonderful parents, family and community. A culmination of her many years in the guide movement was her gold for the duke of Edinburgh’s award for young Canadians. I was awe struck when she was presented to Prince Philip as she curtsied in excitement to receive the award. She was so proud. I was so proud  She went on to the pinacle of public service at the privy council serving 4 prime ministers. She used her brilliant mind and her warm personality to everything she touched. She was a delight to work with. She was the Poof lady.  She was the perfect public servant. She was the perfect wife. 

Freedom Helen Hayward

The other night

Looking out my window

I saw in failing light

A flock of geese flying low.

Bright red leaves were falling

Slowly to the ground

As the geese were faintly calling,

I finally turned around.

I wished I were free

Just like those birds,

Free of pain and worry.

No need for words.

Up above the clouds

I would gladly soar

My spirit proud

And free once more.

But here I’ll stay

Looking out in the night

Waiting for the day

That I shall take flight.

DEATH Michelle Dagenais

Death came to me one day

Early in the month of May

He said that it was time to go

Why, I did not know.

I stopped him, to find out what I had done.

Why was he doing this? Just for fun?

“No,” he whispered quietly to me,

“Listen and you will see.

Sooner or later each life must end

So come’ let me be our friend.”

To me it seemed very unfair

But to protest, I did not dare.

I slowly reached out to grasp his hand

As the setting sun cast shadows on the land.

I wondered about life upon this earth

I realized then that death was really birth.

I was leaving here for a brand new life

A beautiful one; without pain or strife.

Into the dusk I went with Death my friend

Knowing this was the beginning, and not the end.

Wendy – Prayers

Let us pray:

Eternal God

in whom we live and move and have our being,

in whose love and power the world took shape

and we were born and our lives are lived and we die:

Grant us now the silence of heart

in which we can recall that we are never separated from your love.

Nous prions maintenant Dieu,

Source de vie et Donneur d’amour

Nous te remercions pour tous ceux qui partagent nos vies:

Pour les familles et des êtres chers;

Pour les amis et les voisins.

Surtout aujourd’hui, nous te remercions pour Kelly

We praise you, O God,

for all in Kelly that was so generous, wise and joyful;

for the love she gave and received;

for all that lives on through those who knew and loved her.

Comforting and caring God,

we pray for the many friends and family of Kelly,

for all who grieve this loss;

Especially today we hold

Kelly’s husband, Daniel,

her mother, Marvia,

her sister Amy,

brother-in-law, Larry

and nieces Sofia and Leah

and all of the Cayouette family

close before you in our prayers.

May each one know the comfort of your love,

through the support of others

and the peace of your presence today and in the days to come.

Guide us all as we seek to offer one another care, healing and hope.

Strong and tender God,

In Jesus, you share the joy and sorrow of this life

and so we pray too for people anywhere,

everywhere who will mourn a death this day:

to all who sorrow,

may your peace and comfort be made known.

Dieu de grâces, par la résurrection de ton fils

tu nous as donné un espoir nouveau et vivant.

Aide-nous à comprendre que ni la mort ni la

vie,

ni les choses présentes ni les choses à venir,

ne peuvent nous séparer de ton amour.

And Grant us faith that,by day and by night,

in all times and all places, we may without fear

entrust those who are dear to us to your never-failing love,

in this life, and in the life to come; in the name of Jesus,

who taught us how to pray

Lord’s Prayer

Our Father who art in heaven

Hallowed be thy name

thy kingdom come, thy will be done

on earth as it is in heaven

give us this day our daily bread

and forgive us our trespasses as

we forgive those who trespass against us.

And lead us not into temptation

but deliver us from evil

For thine is the kingdom, the power and the glory

Forever and ever. Amen.

Committal

You God are immortal, the creator of all.

We are mortal, formed of the earth and to the earth we shall return.

Into your hands, O merciful Saviour,

We commend your servant, Kelly

Acknowledge, we pray,

a sheep of your fold,

a lamb of your flock,

and a daughter of your redeeming grace.

Receive her into the arms of your mercy,

into the blessed rest of everlasting peace,

and into the glorious company of the saints in light.

Amen

Blessing – and as you each go forth from this day

may

God be your comfort, your strength

God be your hope and support

God be your light and your way

And the blessing of God,

Creator, Redeemer and Sustainer

Remain with you now and for ever. Amen.